He Said My Name

Paleo fudge brownies, paleo raspberry-
filled sugar cookies, shortbread

February 14, 2019

I took some special goodies I'd baked to the care facility today, along with a beautiful card I had chosen for my husband. Usually, I have to settle for a card that isn't too awful. I'm sure you know how it is! This one, though, perfectly expressed my feelings about our life together and our love for each other in spite of the uncertainty of our future. I couldn't  have written it better myself. But this post isn't about the card or the cookies.

He was lying down on his bed when I got there, staring at the wall and not responding to me at all. I sat next to him and read the card out loud, and he almost smiled once or twice. I fed him a brownie and a raspberry-filled sandwich cookie (okay, maybe this post is about the card and the cookies, sort of), and then the music playing through his headphones began to perk him up. It always does, because music is magic.

The hospice chaplain had arranged to meet me there in order to share communion again, the three of us. By the time he arrived, my husband and I had "danced" into the common area, eaten some pretty fabulous chocolate-covered strawberries prepared by the staff, and were sitting in the dining room. I'm not always sure whether or not he knows who I am, but he's usually happy to hang out with me. Today, he seemed to really know me. He held my hand tightly, leaning towards me for kiss after kiss on the cheek. It was very touching and tender and heartwarming. And bittersweet.

As the chaplain came over to our table, I leaned in to my husband, saying his name to focus his attention on our guest. Staring straight ahead, he responded with my name. His name; my name. Just like that. It's the only word he spoke during the more than three hours I was there today. What a gift it was, though!

Happy Valentine's Day to me!